It's been 4 weeks since my hysterectomy...
I"m sure my body is healing because my pain has lessened as time goes by. But I continue to be really tired. Today, I took a 3 hour nap (and i'm not a natural napper) and still I'm tired! But this is not the only evidence of my low energy. There are 2 opportunities to sing to night...both of them are strong desires for me. One is to sing with 1000 other people in a large community sing in Powderhorn Park. How cool it is that people in this community are bringing back singing as a way to connect with our community. I wish I could be there. The other opportunity is that my church choir is singing Godspell along with the children of the congregation tonight. Something magical happens when the children and the adult voices join forces in song! I wish I could be there too. Instead, I am so tired I find myself unable to find enough energy to go for either. And this makes me really sad.
I don't think I've ever felt so weak, so lacking in energy, so really tired. I've also never been so overweight. There are other symptoms--a messy house, frustration with my job, loneliness, etc. I'm tired of being tired. I know that it is reasonable to be tired after this type of surgery but I was stressed and tried before that. I want to get well! I want to be healthy and strong! I want to live into my passions and do what I'm called to do. I want to be the real Jules!
I know it's a big order but at this moment I"m asking, I'm opening to all the can bring me health and strength and energy and I'm letting go as much as I know how of all that will continue to tire me and make me sick.
I guess I just figure at this point, there is no where to look but up. There is no way to look but up.
