WHO IS HELPING WHOM?

Oh, I wish I was good at remembering names! Sigh! Today was a day for re-membering names. Today was a day for dragonflies whispering in my heart as they flew by. Today was a day to be re-minded, re-connected to the truth that we are all one.

This morning I had the privilege to join five other sweet voices and sing in the presence and with three, no four, very sweet ladies in a group home for the elderly. In spite of their inability to remember or have fluent conversation, their glowing eyes and loving energy added so much to the songs that hopped into our midst. As I sing in hospice choir, it continues to amaze me how much the "recipient" offers to the song. I am in awe of this holy experience where the song flows both ways even when only half of us have a voice. And as we sang, the faint whisper of angels began to be felt in my warmth. The angels are happy being with those sweet old ladies.Oh, how I wish I remembered their names...Audrey, Margaret, Millie and who?

This afternoon, I attended a funeral for a sweet person who left us, way too early it seems, through the hell of suicide. But the joy of the family in their brother and son reminded me that what I think is too early might be the best and perfect time for someone else. The faint flutter of dragonfly wings and angel songs could be heard in the background as family and friends danced with each other in a graceful dance of remembering and comforting. Aren't human beings wonderful?!

Tonight I went to sing with my hospice choir at Bethesda Hospital, a place where the sickest of the sick stay for weeks and months as they try to recover from looking at death's door and get back on their feet. Some eventually give up the fight and others stay the course and manage to get there. All touch us as we look in their tired eyes and sing our smallest and best bit of hope for tomorrow to them.  We truly believe that no matter which way they go, that our songs might offer the way to get there. But it is their presence with us, their acceptance of my voice, my song that seems more like the life-giving gift."Yes! This is why I am here," I think. And then I realize that I wouldn't think that if it wasn't for them. There are angels hovering 'round and there are angels lying in the beds sick and looking back at me with the most loving eyes.And I wish I could call them by name.

Who saves whom? who is the giver and who the receiver? Who is the healed and who the healer? By the time this day ended, I am struck by how often I set out to help or at least be in the presence of and end up leaving with a stronger heart and a healed pain.

Thank you to Audrey, Tim, Millie, Marilyn, John, Deb and everyone out there who offered their healing to me today. Thank you.

Breakfast of Champions--Spring 2010

I wake up to the smell of breakfast cooking
Lilac, crab apple, and deep pink blossoms
A glass of sunshine pouring through my window
Florescent green leaves dressing my plate
Squirrels chasing bunnies provide entertainment
All are seasoned by a shower of pollen
A feast of procreation, recreation and co-creation
I too feel ready to give birth
Life and inspiration growing within my heart
Through nine long months of autumn and winter
I'm ready to live into this new life
Pink tulips, purple vinca and green carpets of grass
Bursting forth from my soul
Feasting on this breakfast of champions
Ready to take on the day
Welcome spring and rebirth!

by Julie A. Bonde
May 1-2010